Obedience and Intimacy
There is a major difference between the obedience we want for our kids and the obedience God wants for us. I've posted several times on this theme over the last 2 years. God wants increasing intimacy and dependence, and the resulting character and power that that increasing intimacy and dependence by us with and on Him will produce in us. That's not a parent's goal for their children, if the parent is truly loving and healthy.
I don't want my 23-y-o to call me every morning and talk over what he needs to get done today and the best ways to do that -- but if he did, we could still work with it and move toward something healthier. But if my 30-y-o married son were doing that, I would have shown that my parenting goals had been all about me and my needs, rather than about his health and happiness. I want my boys to be capable of negotiating life without me, because I will not always be here, and because I am not the source of all wisdom and comfort. God is, and He wants them to depend upon Him and to grow in many interdependent relationships of many types. The relationship with Mom moves toward decreasing intimacy. The relationships with a wife and with children and with all they myriad relationships of a full life will build a balanced and happy adult life.
God, on the other hand, is our Source of wisdom and protection and comfort. He doesn't want to teach us how to do it all without Him, and have us move on toward independence. Jesus tells us in John 14 and 15 that the only way to do this life successfully is by abiding in Him -- living in ever-increasing intimacy and dependence, which will not result in the kind of sick shrivelled personality that dependence upon any other person would, but which will result in power and character and wisdom.
I am typing in a hotel room this morning, and cannot take the time to fill in all the scriptural links that I will polish this off with later . . . but I'll publish now, because those of you who know scripture already get the links here, and those of you who don't will see this concept anywhere you open that Book and start reading.
God doesn't want you to figure out how to do this life on your own. He is moving you toward a maturity that is fully dependant and fully intimate . . . on Him and with Him. And out of that intimacy, you will become strong and beautiful, and you will love and know those around you in all the ways He intends for you and them. He will meet some of your needs through them, and some of their need through you . . . but He will be the Source of all met needs.
May today move me . . . may today move you . . . toward that intimacy and maturity.